Autism CareWalk

Today we walked in the Autism CareWalk with some teachers and staff from Olivia's school.  I had signed up to walk before we received the autism spectrum diagnosis for Olivia.  Wow, what a turnout and such great support!  It was a beautiful morning (although a bit windy) and we had a great time.  Abigail especially liked picking out all the doggies.  

Twenty minutes

Twenty minutes jogging, no walking: that was my challenge today. It was a big jump from my last run.

And I did it.  It wasn't pretty. . .it was windy and I took it pretty slow, but I did it. And my blood sugar was 80 afterwards (I just have to take a glucose tablet for every mile I run.  I'm learning.) Just a few weeks ago I couldn't run two minutes at a time.  And now I can run two miles!  I'm feeling pretty accomplished.  My energy is up, my restless legs are better and my blood sugar is improving.  

My Sweet Girls

17 Months

Yesterday my baby turned 17 months old.  17 months old already!  She is just an awesome little girl and we are so blessed.  She is finally sleeping through the night pretty consistently (as long as we keep the thermostat below 70 degrees.) Abigail has had 5 teeth forever and now she is getting about 5 more all at once.  She has been a bit cranky lately because of it.  She is about 31 inches tall and weighs almost 26 lbs! Olivia and Abigail are now the best of friends and it is so amazing to watch.  Nobody can make Abigail laugh like Olivia can. I love my girls so much! 

The BIG Slide

She's fearless, stubborn, smart and cute!  Watch out world! 

March For Babies

Please take a moment to consider donating to our March of Dimes team or signing up to walk with us.  You can do so by clicking on the sidebar to the right.  The March For Babies is in two weeks!  I'd love for you to be there to support Olivia as the ambassador.  She doesn't quite know what it means, but she would understand better if all of us were there to support her as we share her story.  Thank you so very much!!

Sandbox Fun

Fun Run

I don't think I ever posted pictures of Olivia's Fun Run at school.  I think she ran about 1 1/2 miles!  Way to go, girlie!

She did so good and I was so proud of her! 

Visual Learning

When Olivia went through the psychological testing last month, we discovered that she is brilliant with pattern recognition and spatial awareness and other visual learning tasks. Do you remember in school where they'd show you a shape and you had to pick which one was the same shape flipped and rotated 90 degrees, etc? Olivia is amazing at this.  For example, Abigail has started playing with mega blocks so Olivia has started playing with them too.  She created this in her room and took a picture.

Later this evening, with almost complete memorization, she recreated a flipped U shape with the end piece now at the beginning. Without even thinking about it, she knew which way to orient the pieces.  I even had to think about which way they would go.  It was astonishing to watch.  Then she had me make blocks and we paired them up in partners.  When it was time to go to bed, she told me to put my blocks back in the bag, but I couldn't remember which ones were mine.  She had no problem, of course, telling me the 13 blocks that were hers. LOL!  And you should see how she puts on her shirts. . .face up and upside down on the floor in front of her.  Then she scoops it up and puts it on. Never gets it wrong. LOL! Smarty pants. 

March of Dimes Update

Our team is looking great this year!  I don't think there is any way we are going to pass the number one team as they are one awesome team!  Isn't it great the money they are raising?  I believe they walk in memory of their little boy, Miles.  God bless them. 

If you haven't donated yet, however, please consider a small donation.  Olivia is the ambassador this year and it is quite an honor.  We walked into Famous Footwear last week and they are one of the March of Dimes' sponsors.  It was neat when they found out they were meeting the ambassador.  I walk every year to honor Olivia and all of the premature babies who have been through so much.  But I also walk as one of the few ways I have to remember Logan.  I feel that because he lived his short life within the NICU walls, not many people got to meet him or develop memories with him.  So it is up to me, his mom, to remind people that he is worth remembering. Please help me do that every year and especially this year as I wish he could be standing on that stage with us as well. 

Thank you all for your support and for reading my blog.  You can donate or sign up to walk by clicking the badge on the right sidebar. 

Turning A New Leaf

I’m currently reading a book about living in the present (or the now) and not in the past or the future.

I’ve found that I spend most of my time allowing my mind to drift into the past with regret or guilt or in the future with unease and worry.  Every single day of my life.  It is so hard for me to be still and not allow my mind to wander.  It’s interesting because whenever I attempt to do so, there is always a cat in my lap. . .as if they can sense my availability.  I could learn a lot from them I’m sure. 

Recently I was listening to the clock tick and the refrigerator hum and I looked over and noticed that my beloved plant was almost dead.  How did I not notice before? I bought Hilga (yes, my plant has a name) in February 2001.  I bought her the first weekend in my new apartment over 13 years ago and now the poor thing was near death.

So, I repotted her, moved her to a new part of the house, watered her and I’ve enjoyed watching her.  I analyze each branch for any sign of life. 

Olivia has enjoyed it too and even drew a picture of her. (And, yes, she probably had about that many leaves. LOL!)

Her bare, brown branches are turning green with the hope of new leaves.  This has been quite therapeutic for me.  If a plant can come back after years of neglect, maybe I can return after years of neglecting myself? Maybe there is hope for me?

Easter Bunny

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Olivia looked adorable for Workout Wednesday at school. On Friday her school has their first annual Fun Run!


This morning, we repotted Hilga, my 13 yr old plant. I bought her the weekend I moved out of my parents' house in February 2001. She has needed a lot of love lately. She now has a new pot and a new place in the house.



The rest of the day was pretty crappy. I managed to lock myself out of the house. Abigail and I were going for a walk and when I got the stroller out of the back of the van, I left my phone. I had my house key, so I went around to the front door and found that I had locked the storm door. So I could not get in the house and I didn't have my phone to call anyone.

I ended up going to a neighbor's house to use their phone to call Ryan who had to leave work to let us in. We played in the sandbox a really long time. I sifted out like one hundred rolly pollies. It's a breeding ground for them apparently, but not a very good one as they were all dead. And then Abigail had a big blowout and I didn't have the diaper bag. Ugh. It's been an awful afternoon!! I'm happy to be inside now. 😉

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My Little Sweetie

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First Pigtails

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Not Giving Up

It has been much harder than I thought to start running. First I had tons of knee pain. I figured out that I over pronate and needed shoes with more support. So I bought new shoes and still had pain. I had to completely rest my knees for a bit. I had gotten to week 4 when I had to stop. I bought a Gazelle Edge to use that is easier on my knees and added in some strengthening and a lot more stretching.

I started running again last week, but had to start completely over at week 1. My knee pain, thankfully, is gone. Today, however, I've hit another brick wall. I checked my blood sugar before I left and it was 104. When I returned from my 30 minute run/walk, my blood sugar was 46. A blood sugar of 50 is hypoglycemic. A blood sugar of 40 is critical and puts you at risk of losing consciousness. So. . .great. Apparently now I get exercise induced hypoglycemia. I knew exercise lowered my blood sugar, but didn't think it would drop it by 50! Now I have to make a few more changes. I'm going to monitor it more closely, eat carbs beforehand, carry glucose tablets and possibly wear a diabetes bracelet. If I were to collapse, no one would know what was wrong with me. I also might get a running buddy or run at the Y.

Running has proven to be a lot more difficult than I anticipated. But it has lowered my blood sugar (albeit too much) and helped my restless legs and my mood. So I will continue and someday I'll run a 5k. It may be awhile, but someday you'll see pictures of it on here. At least that's the plan.


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Best Little Sis Ever

See? It says right here!


So it must be true!


I won't lie. The first year or so was tough. Olivia does not do well with change so you add a major life event like a new baby sister and it's gonna be hard. She had a lot of jealousy and felt Abigail took her mommy away. I am so happy that they now seem to absolutely love each other. They both learn a lot from each other as well and that has been such a blessing. Olivia often calls her the best sister ever and can't imagine life without her.

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World Autism Awareness Day

I thought this would be a tough blog post for me to write, but as I form the words in my mind, I don’t believe that to be the case. 

For years after Olivia was born, I wondered what she would have been like had she been born full term.  If I could take away her rough start and have her grow up with Logan, I would do it in a heartbeat.  But, as Olivia grew and her personality emerged. . .I fell in love with exactly who she is.  I don’t care what she “would” have been like because she is perfect as she is.  She is the Olivia we all know and love.

Recently, we took her to a child psychologist so that we could help her in some areas that are difficult for her.  She has some sensory processing difficulties and breaks down in tears over a pair of jeans or a shirt that doesn’t feel just right.  Eating and gaining weight are still challenges and her anxiety can be pretty severe.  I feel that life is only going to get tougher and I want to give her all the coping skills and strategies available. 

We found that Olivia does have autism spectrum disorder.  You never want to use your child’s name and the word autism in the same sentence.  However, I don’t see it as anything “wrong” with her.  Olivia is Olivia and I love everything about her.

I debated about whether to discuss it on the blog.  On the one hand, this blog is meant to raise awareness and educate people on the effects of extreme prematurity.  Autism and extreme prematurity go hand in hand quite often.  I always want to help others going through a similar journey.  But, on the other hand, I want to protect my child from being labeled before people get to know her.  The scary incident a few weeks back helped me to decide that it is worth sharing.  It takes Olivia a little bit longer to process information such as “Look out! There’s a car!”  As she stood frozen, trying to process what was being said, a car backed into her, knocked her down onto the concrete and she suffered a mild concussion.  She does require a bit more attention than your normal 6 1/2 year old. To keep her safe, I feel others need to be aware of this and it is what prompted me to share the news of her diagnosis.

Today is World Autism Awareness Day so I thought today would be appropriate to share the news. Autism has many faces and no two children are the same.  Olivia is at the high functioning end of the spectrum with fairly mild characteristics.  As her mother, it’s my job to make sure she gets all the tools available in order to be successful. I’m not content with her being successful “as a 23 weeker.”  I want her to achieve all that she wants in life. . . as a person like you or me.  I hope her diagnosis helps people understand what she needs and not define who she is.  She is an awe-inspiring, sweet, funny, energetic, one of a kind girl.  High functioning autism is just one tiny facet of who she is.  I hope everyone who crosses her path in life is able to see just how amazing she is.   

Monday, March 31, 2014

I love Spring! But for entirely different reasons than I used to. Spring means short sleeved shirts and leggings and socks are soon to become optional. These things are Olivia's forté! LOL! Getting dressed will become less of a challenge!






And Abigail decided she no longer wanted to be in a high chair! She wanted to sit at the table like the rest of us. She was overjoyed with her booster seat. . .as you can tell.




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Friends Forever

We met up with Olivia's friend from preschool yesterday. They go to different school districts this year, so they don't get to see each other often. However, they seem to pick right up where they left off. And look at the joy on their faces!













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Hippity Hoppity

Easter's on its way!










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Sisters and Best Friends

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Happy Birthday

To my husband, Ryan. Hope you had a great birthday (even with a pouting wife whose team lost.) We love you so much!












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PROUD

Great season and an even greater team! Proud to be from Wichita!





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Just Keep. . .Running!

So, my running hit a little snag. Well, actually a pretty big snag as it started killing my knees. They felt like they were going to collapse when I ran and hurt for days afterwards. But I didn't want to just give up. So I went into a local running store where they evaluate your gait and determine the best kind of shoes for you. It turns out I over pronate which means my foot rolls inward. So, I just needed a more supportive shoe to stabilize my foot. I bought a pair of Brooks running shoes and it made a world of difference!!




So, this weekend I begin my 3rd week with high hopes that I will be able to continue! Possible 5k on May 24th??? We will see.

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Go Shox!

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16 Months

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Hall of Fame

World Autism Awareness Day

I thought this would be a tough blog post for me to write, but as I form the words in my mind, I don’t believe that to be the case. 

For years after Olivia was born, I wondered what she would have been like had she been born full term.  If I could take away her rough start and have her grow up with Logan, I would do it in a heartbeat.  But, as Olivia grew and her personality emerged. . .I fell in love with exactly who she is.  I don’t care what she “would” have been like because she is perfect as she is.  She is the Olivia we all know and love.

Recently, we took her to a child psychologist so that we could help her in some areas that are difficult for her.  She has some sensory processing difficulties and breaks down in tears over a pair of jeans or a shirt that doesn’t feel just right.  Eating and gaining weight are still challenges and her anxiety can be pretty severe.  I feel that life is only going to get tougher and I want to give her all the coping skills and strategies available. 

We found that Olivia does have autism spectrum disorder.  You never want to use your child’s name and the word autism in the same sentence.  However, I don’t see it as anything “wrong” with her.  Olivia is Olivia and I love everything about her.

I debated about whether to discuss it on the blog.  On the one hand, this blog is meant to raise awareness and educate people on the effects of extreme prematurity.  Autism and extreme prematurity go hand in hand quite often.  I always want to help others going through a similar journey.  But, on the other hand, I want to protect my child from being labeled before people get to know her.  The scary incident a few weeks back helped me to decide that it is worth sharing.  It takes Olivia a little bit longer to process information such as “Look out! There’s a car!”  As she stood frozen, trying to process what was being said, a car backed into her, knocked her down onto the concrete and she suffered a mild concussion.  She does require a bit more attention than your normal 6 1/2 year old. To keep her safe, I feel others need to be aware of this and it is what prompted me to share the news of her diagnosis.

Today is World Autism Awareness Day so I thought today would be appropriate to share the news. Autism has many faces and no two children are the same.  Olivia is at the high functioning end of the spectrum with fairly mild characteristics.  As her mother, it’s my job to make sure she gets all the tools available in order to be successful. I’m not content with her being successful “as a 23 weeker.”  I want her to achieve all that she wants in life. . . as a person like you or me.  I hope her diagnosis helps people understand what she needs and not define who she is.  She is an awe-inspiring, sweet, funny, energetic, one of a kind girl.  High functioning autism is just one tiny facet of who she is.  I hope everyone who crosses her path in life is able to see just how amazing she is.   

March for Babies

Please consider clicking over on the March of Dimes banner to your right. I would love for you to sign up to walk on our team for the March for Babies on May 3rd. If you can't make it, please consider a donation (no matter how small) to our team. Our family believes that even the smallest of things can make the biggest difference. I can't imagine a life without my sweet, funny and energetic Olivia. The March of Dimes played a part in that through their research and tireless efforts to save even the smallest of babies. Thank you so much for all of your support!





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Winning The Race

For many, many years I have wanted to be a runner. I like the solitude of it. As a mom, you tend to forget what that word even means. I like how it transforms not only your body, but your mind. And for many, many years I have struggled with fatigue, depression, anxiety, restless legs, high blood sugar, migraines, etc. I finally decided to do something about it, lace up my sneakers and run! (Although I had to find the right kind of shoes because I get shin splints easily.)

I have an app on my phone, C25K, and each week it gradually builds you up to run a 5K with an initial combination of walking and running. I'm almost done with my second week which is the most I've ever done. I'm pretty proud of myself for doing something for ME, although it's for my family too. Olivia has been complaining when I leave and I try to explain to her that she should want me to go.

"Don't you want a mom who isn't tired all the time?"

It took a little convincing and then she started cheering me on. I told Ryan that is why I want to run a 5K. I want to hear Olivia cheering "Go mommy! You can do it!" Olivia then told me she would be happy to do it. . .as long as I'm winning. LOL! She'd better just hope that I finish or rather that I start to begin with.

Tonight when I got back (after showing Olivia the gorgeous moon) she asked,"Did you win, mom?"

I checked off another day, so yes, I won.



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