So, I’ve finally decided to write a book about my experiences over the last 3.5 years. What I’m going to do with the book. . .I don’t know. It’s mainly a way for me to remember how I got to where I am today and why I’m the way that I am. Losing a child changes you in ways that I’m only beginning to see. Maybe it will also help others who are going through similar hardships. That is my prayer.
I have a title and am already well into chapter three and have been writing for over 4 hours tonight. I’m using excerpts from my blog which has made me dive back into the fall of 2007. That was such a difficult time. It’s amazing the things that you remember and the things that you forget. I’m so grateful to have so many things written down. I (thankfully)remember little about vent settings and oxygen requirements and the day to day NICU life. I am currently in the middle of writing about the night Logan died and am flooded with emotion. Please don’t ever forget about my son. Hopefully, this book will be a way to remember him as well. Let’s just hope that for the first time in my adult life, I actually finish writing a book.