Saying Good-bye

My grandpa’s funeral is tomorrow and I can’t get rid of this pain in the pit of my stomach.  Maybe it’s worry as Olivia woke up early this morning with a fever.  Of all the times for any of us to get sick. . .this is not one of them.  And, I don’t do well being apart from my little girl when she’s sick.  Maybe it’s lack of sleep as I haven’t slept good lately.  One night, I get the call that my grandpa has passed away. . .the next night, I’m up with Olivia.  Maybe it’s dread as I have to say good-bye.  Maybe it’s sympathy for my sweet grandmother who wants nothing more than her husband back and for my mother who is missing her dad.  Maybe it’s the realization that we all get older and inevitably face the same demise.  Maybe it’s a bit of everything.  Losing your grandfather is a different feeling of loss than losing your son.  You know, that at some point, you are going to lose your grandparents.  The same does not hold true for your son.  It is still, however, an awful feeling of emptiness and pain and sorrow.  Ryan and I walked into a frequented restaurant today after the viewing of my grandpa and our familiar waitress noticed we were just a party of two.  “Where’s the little one?” she asked.  “With her grandparents,” we replied.  “Ah. . .there’s nothing like grandparents,” she said.  That hit home for me today.  There truly is nothing like grandparents and seeing how close Olivia is to hers really brings it full circle.  I can’t help but envision Olivia in 30-40 years time and finding herself in the same position as me. . .saying good-bye to her grandpa. . .one of the best men she knows.   Nobody is ever ready for that. 

I find great comfort in knowing that my grandpa is with our Heavenly Father.  He’s no longer in pain or afflicted with any worldly ailment.  I find comfort in knowing that he will be buried close by my son.  I don’t know why that makes a difference, but I feel a peace knowing that they are together in heaven as well as on earth.   These comforts are what help us through the hardships of life and they come directly from our Savior.  Amazing to know that my grandpa is there. . .with Him.  I can’t imagine the joyous reunions taking place and the smiles on my grandpa’s face.  It’s difficult to say good-bye, but we will meet again. . .my grandpa, my son and me.   

My Grandpa

My grandpa passed away early this morning.  My mom was able to be there with him and my grandma and for that I am grateful.    He was such a great man and will be very missed.  Please pray for my family and especially my grandmother during this difficult time. 

Olivia Cont. . .

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

As you know, Olivia LOVES music.  She sings amazingly on pitch, has great rhythm and really enjoys playing the piano.  She likes to find a note on the piano and match pitch or sing a note and find it on the piano.  It’s really amazing.  We have musicians on both sides of the family, but she didn’t get it from her daddy or me.  I suspect that music is going to be a big part of her life. . .who knows, but that’s my guess.   We’re probably going to need to buy her a piano at some point too.

My All Time Favorites Part 1

Tonight, I was looking back through old pictures and thought I would compile a collection of my all-time favorite pictures of Olivia.  I only made it through to July 2008 and I was out of space, so. . . this is just the first installment.  What a trip down memory lane.  I didn’t realize how many cute pictures I had of my sweet girl.  I’m hoping to print these pages off for her baby book, but thought I would also share them with you.  Enjoy!

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Not too much going on around here.  Ryan had to go back to work today for the first time since Christmas Eve. . .we were sad to see him leave.  Olivia goes back to school on Thursday after a long Christmas break, so hopefully she adjusts okay.  We’ve been busy “remodeling” our dining room.  Ryan asked me what I wanted for my birthday (in about a month) and initially I said a new desk.  But, then, I thought. . .I don’t want to spend the money on a desk when that money could go towards a new dining room table.  So, he decided that’s what I would get for my birthday. . .a new table. . .along with new flooring for the dining room (we now have carpet that we’ve never been happy with.)  Ryan always goes elaborate for my birthday. . .one year I got a new car!  We have tentatively decided on vinyl that looks just like tile.  We brought a sample piece home and it matches our décor perfectly.  I’m sooo excited!!!  Funny the things that excite you when you get older.

And, we purchased our table yesterday and it is beeeeautiful!  I love it!  I can’t wait to share pictures.  We bought the hutch that went with it because they were having a big sale on them, so I need to find a new home for my baker’s rack.  If anyone is interested, let me know.  I can email you a picture. 

I’m trying to start the year off with a more positive attitude, more spring in my step and a better outlook on life.  Ryan and I had one of the best days yesterday.  We went shopping, went out to lunch, washed my car and went to a movie.  We haven’t spent a whole day alone together in a looooong time.  It was amazing and both of us really needed it!  Thanks to Grandma Mary for watching Olivia. . .they always have a blast together.   I promise I’ll get around to posting new pictures of Olivia someday soon!