Would I believe you when you would say
Your hand will guide my every way
Will I receive the words You say
Every moment of every day
(chorus)
Well I will walk by faith
Even when I cannot see
Well because this broken road
Prepares Your will for me
Help me to win my endless fears
You've been so faithful for all my years
With one breath
You make me new
Your grace covers all I do
Ryan and I have been trying really hard not to worry as much and to put our trust in God. By placing Logan and Olivia in God’s care (and He loves them even more than we do) why should we worry? Isn’t that what faith is all about? Of course, we are human and it’s only natural for us to feel emotions like anger and worry and fear. Sometimes I don’t know if my body and mind could be any more exhausted. I’ve never felt such emotional fatigue in all of my life. But, the more I learn to trust in Him, the less weary I become. That is the only way that Ryan and I are able to keep putting one foot in front of the other and to get through each day.
My dear Olivia has been having it a little rougher the last couple of days. Her vent settings and oxygen have been a little higher. They stopped her caffeine today as well because she has also been losing some weight. She is still on 16 cc of milk, but they have added some formula to it. At first I questioned whether they thought that my milk wasn’t good enough. I guess she needs more calories and because she is premature, they are unable to just keep increasing the amount of milk given. So, they want more calories per cc instead. She also has her first vaccination tomorrow (Hepatitis B) so be thinking of her. She still hasn’t wanted to be bothered much, but she allowed us to hand hug her and read her a story. She only wants to hear one chapter at a time (of the Adventures of Johnny Chuck) and gets squirmy if we read more than that. It’s kind of funny because we always read one chapter each night when I was pregnant. Please pray that she becomes more stable and that her body becomes stronger each day.
Well, they think they might have learned more about what is going on with Logan. The culprit may be his thyroid and they have started him on some thyroid medication. We do not know if it will be a long term problem for him or if it’s just due to his immaturity. It seems to be helping him urinate better, but he still has a lot of fluids to get rid of. Also, his liver and kidneys have taken some damage. These organs are able to regenerate, so hopefully there won’t be any long term damage. The liver isn’t producing the proteins that the body needs to properly dispose of fluids. The best thing for the liver is time and feeding. When fed, the gut promotes the best response from the liver. They are going to try to start his feedings up again tomorrow. His vent settings and oxygen are still higher, but his blood pressure seems to be fine. Please pray for continual healing of his little body. Sorry that we don’t have any updated pictures of him. He looks so uncomfortable and his body is so swollen that taking pictures is the last thing on my mind.
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